This is a bit of a rampage, but stick with me. The concept of obsession has been hijacked by social media. It’s now a word that is so overused and distorted, I’ve erased it from my personal dictionary. I immediately scroll past any TikTok that begins with “I’m obsessed.” I’m taking a stand!
I’m not typically so literal, but I think this subject warrants reflection. Because obsession is not a positive. It’s labelled a disorder in the mental health community for a reason! Not really something to celebrate.
Obsession means that you can’t stop doing something. That you are doing it unconsciously. That it dominates your life. That you have to be perfect about it or there will be dire consequences.
In the world of food, obsession can take the form of hard-core dietary restrictions, attachment to habits and routines, strict judgments about certain foods. I’m not talking about eating disorders here. I’m talking about how our society pushes everyone to obsessively eat or avoid certain foods. Superfoods are Mandatory. Kale is King. Sugar is the devil. Don’t take a bite of that!
Can you relate to any of this? As someone who has suffered with gut health problems for over a decade, I definitely can.
I have SIBO – an intestinal bacterial condition that is very hard to eliminate. Eating the “right thing” is important, as the physical consequences of not doing so can be severe. For me, it’s about extremely uncomfortable bloating. Something I desperately want to avoid. So I’ve learned to obsess. About using my low FODMAPS app when shopping, to make sure everything I’m buying is “legal” on my restricted diet. About checking restaurant menus before eating out to make sure they have gluten-free options. About the impact any particular food is going to have on my belly. About that post-meal belly – how horrible it feels and looks. And finally, I’ve obsessed about wearing things that hide that symptom.
This was my unconscious habit. And it’s only recently that I’ve realized just how damaging this obsession is. It’s nothing but negative energy. It creates anxiety. It reduces joy. It’s not healthy at all!
Last year, my functional nutritionist “diagnosed” my perspective, and decided that no treatment was going to work until it changed. To be honest, I was furious at first. I had worked hard over quite a few years to treat my problem with a variety of protocols, made almost no progress and now someone is telling me I have an attitude problem?? But she was totally right. Your brain can get in the way of your healing. And I have since engaged in a couple of neural repatterning programs that have completely changed the way I look at things – in a super cool way.
A big insight for me was learning that, instead of being obsessed, I can become curious. I can transform “have to” into “want to”. I can open the door to possibilities vs. keeping myself stuck.
Take a minute to feel the difference. What happens in your mind and body when you feel “obsessed”? For me, it’s tense, narrow, out of control, anxious and needy. But curiosity? Curiosity feels good! I feel interested and wise. I feel open and eager. I feel like I can experiment, learn and evolve. I feel relaxed. And I feel proud of that mindset.
This revised perspective has been a game changer for me. The fact that my SIBO hasn’t completely healed doesn’t bother me nearly as much as it used to. Instead of being obsessed with outcomes, I’ve gotten curious about how different things might help my symptoms. Things like eating a little more simply, eating more slowly, sitting down for 10 minutes after a meal and digesting. Noticing when I’m going down an obsessive path and consciously shifting to a more empowering perspective. And I find that I feel a lot better. I can eat more broadly than I used to without severe consequences. Or maybe I’m just not dwelling on them as much.
Let’s talk about how you might apply curiosity vs. obsession to your food routines. If you are obsessed with intermittent fasting, try eating a protein-rich breakfast for a week and observe how your energy might be different throughout the day. If you eat the same thing for breakfast every day because you feel it’s healthiest, try branching out for more nutrient variety. If you have always hated a certain healthy food, force yourself to “try it again, for the first time.” Find a compelling recipe that pairs it with stuff you love. Serve it alongside something else you love. People’s tastes change. What if you actually end up liking it?
Have I convinced you? Obsession is stressful and limiting. But curiosity breeds growth, wisdom and room for imperfection. Is there something you think you might be a little too obsessive about when it comes to your health? How could you become curious instead?
